Chapters
Choosing your living arrangement
Introduction
Before you decide on a new living arrangement, the first step is to understand what you are trying to achieve with this change. In Exploring your 'good life' (Stage 1, Chapter 2) you looked at what a good life means for you; where you live is a big part of that.
Understanding your reasons for wanting to change your living situation is important as this will guide the arrangement you choose. It may influence the urgency of your situation, define your expectations or impact how broad your options are.
Most people don’t live in the same place forever. Don’t start this journey thinking whatever you choose now has to last for another 50 years. Life can change, and your needs might too. Many people try a variety of different environments while they work out which situation works best for them.
Identifying your ideal living scenario
Thinking about what you want your life to be like and challenging your assumptions will help you shape what this move could look like.
You may have a clear picture in your mind about what you are trying to achieve. If that is the case, it is important to ask yourself: is this the best choice for me, or just what most people do?
It can be helpful to think through the broad range of living situations that exist and identify what the right option for you might look like. The ideal living situation for one person is never the same as for someone else; knowing what is going to make it great for you is important.
Finding the most practical option
Identifying your ideal scenario is an important first step; however, the realities of housing availability, affordability and finding the right people to live with cannot be ignored. Finding suitable housing (especially if you need accessible housing) can be very difficult, and even more so when it needs to be affordable. You might need to be creative or to compromise when making your decisions.
You will need to consider whether you have the budget for your desired living situation, or if you need to compromise to make it sustainable in the long term.
Understanding the risks
It is important to understand the risks that come with different living situations. For example, if you are living in a home owned by a disability support provider, renting a flat from a landlord, or in a home owned by a relative, it means your living situation depends on them.
Before you get started, ask yourself: what if I change support providers? What if I argue with the person who owns the house? What if my flatmate moves out? While this is a risk that exists with most living situations, it is important to think about the long-term commitment you are making.
Where to start
Define your preferred living scenario
When working out your ideal living arrangement, think as widely as possible about all scenarios available to you before narrowing your options to the ones most-aligned with your goals. It is important to keep in mind what you decided in Exploring your 'good life' (Stage 1, Chapter 2).
Here are some ways you might choose to live...
You could live:
- with your family
- with friends or your partner
- with flatmates who are disabled
- with flatmates who are non-disabled
- with paid support
- by yourself
- with other students or workers
You could live in:
- your family’s house
- your own house
- a flat or apartment
- a small house or unit (like a tiny house or granny flat)
- a houseboat, bus house, or campervan
- a boarding house or hostel
- someone else’s home as a guest or boarder
- student housing
- housing that comes with a job
It can be helpful to brainstorm what you need, what you want, and what would be nice to have. Being clear on these three categories can make it easier to prioritise your options when it comes to making decisions. Finding the balance between what is practical, affordable and safe can also be very challenging; so, knowing which pieces you can and cannot compromise on is important.
Next steps
- Read through the example scenarios below
- Use the worksheet below to brainstorm what living arrangements would be best for you
Scenarios
Jack
Jack has a physical disability and has always lived with his family. When he was ready to live on his own, he and his family saw that it would be hard to find another house that worked for him. So, the family moved out and Jack stayed in the house that already suited his needs. He found a flatmate who also needed the same kind of space. They share staff during the day to get the help they both require.
Maria
Maria has an intellectual disability and wants to move out of her parents’ house. Her parents worry about her being alone at night. She doesn’t really need help overnight and there’s no funding for it. Maria now rents a four-bedroom house and moves in with her friend (who also has a disability) and two flatmates who don’t have disabilities. They make a schedule for chores and cooking, and Maria gets support when it’s her turn.
Wiremu
Wiremu is in his 50s and has lived with his sister for most of his adult life. He wants to move out but still wants to live in a busy home. He finds a local boarding house where some people from his work live. The house has eight people in total, a shared kitchen, and a manager who helps keep everything running well.
Worksheets
Define your preferred living scenario
Use this worksheet to brainstorm what living arrangements could work best for you.
